Blog Entry #4.5: Do you think I'm going to die soon? /ᐠ‸⑅‸ ᐟ\ﾉ

I've just turned 16.....I mean.....

Death comes for us all at some point... but so... soon...? I don't know I could die tomorrow, or in weeks months even years!!!! and decades are acceptable.... im not even a legal adult yet and yet im overthinking death I just... dont... understand!!!?? ^U_U^ 

So.... today I was at church, I was with Rose. She goes to church with me..!! she usually helps out at the church..:3c so kind of... like shes one of the nuns :p  We learned about ... praying ..? ... i was actually with Rose the entire time XDD we were in the basement watching veggietales----, with the younger students. I actually was her maybe, one-time assistant, she's kind of like a substitute teacher

So after the ceremony, i stayed with rose for a while.. we prayed together for like 30 minutes. I actually asked about the piano, it's like one of those big ones. So i told her i wanted to go play with it and THIS WAS SO EXCITING TOO!!!! She told me,,, she knows how to play piano!!!!! :3cc 

So she showed me some songs, some TUNES!!!!! And u guys.... she taught me too..!!! >:3c 

and then rose stood behind me on the stool, she grabbed my hands and taught me how from there..!!! :p Now.. my new and improved story format's time to shine!!!! 

Rose: "I learned how to play on this exact type of piano growing up." *She smiles.*

M: "Hm-mm."

R: "What I was first taught were the notes."

M: "hm-mm."

R: *Takes my left hand to the far left on the piano.* "This is the lowest note." *plays it.* 

R: *Then takes my hand to the middle section. "the C area," 

r: *To the far right.* "Then the highest note." *Plays it.*

(She was a bit too close, but i didnt mind :'3)

M: "Hm-mm." *My face was kind of hot at this point.*

R: "...Yeah," *Giggles.* "I think it's sweet that my father taught me. It was back in 6th grade." *She smiles again.* "If you want I can teach you."

Then, I said "SURE!!!!!!!" >:3c We played with the piano for a little bit until the priest walked out from behind the stage, he said hi to us. Now I gotta tell, he's more... like ...mysterious... XD a mysterious... beanstalk... another... one......... I've heard... other.... people... say he's.... youngggg.... right....? ....10 years.... older..... than...

 me.......

.... XDDD

he listens, well, yeah, i talk to him about confessions and stuuf... >:3 

... Is it worthy saying i mentioned george to him...? 

So... george. Yeah. I can't go a single day or night of thinking of him, unless im sleeping ... then yeah T_T... but does he even have any time to look here...? XD???? he hasnt been sleeping well. it's not my responsibility to like, check up after him... but, ... he's one of the people im most close with. :'33 

I know Rose was there... she's not gonna tell anyone... ;^^ hopefully 

Then I told them what happened 

R: "He's sick? And he's had that cough, going on for weeks?" *She, out of nowhere, spoke.*

(I always try to see him everyday, from what I know, he's seen the doctor, a couple of times.)

M: "...Yeah. I'm exteremely worried for him. He.. I thinks he's seeing things..? Like, ... I don't think.. that could be the reason why.. It's... It's because he keeps on going to the woods!! ;>_<" 

R: "have you tried, helping him? With the things he's seeing? ... You know, like going along with what he's doing." 

P: "Have you, my child?"

M: *i was a bit nervous. x'D* "Hmmm. ;u_u I think- (Now that I think about it I was.... really unsure and a bit skeptical ....) we went to the forest together, and.. he like, he saw one of those things, he keeps talking about." 

They said go, and then I did

I haven't seem him since the birthday dinner, ever since summer break, he's barely gone out... I think he's scared, scared of what the world brings.... no, scared of what he brought on. himself I feel, so bad about it. thinking about it now, 

I went into his room, it looked- it was dark, only the sun made the room much brighter through the window I knocked, first, and he answered, he seemed so... weak, like,  it seemed like he hadnt sleeped in days ...?! I could cry at the sight..... I WOULD !!! Then, he brought me in, he... got his computer out saying i gotta show u somehting.. 

Well, the something he showed me, these three guys. George said they're from new jersey, he... it was these videos right? I remember, Vinnie, Ernest then this other one.. george showed me the first and last few videos, then they had a bad habit ??? All to say is, I was comnfused ????? And then these blogs... like ... mine XD  

The videos were ... like... workout videos but with slender man in the background, like... okay honest, I giggled. x'D They knew their stuff, like about weight loss, some of the tips hold up today... but i dont exercise just sometimes..... Q_Q 

I'm hopeless!!!!! \(^o^)/ 

He asked so what do you think, I was confuzzled... like quiet

I didn't believe him. I can say that 

He's unstable right now. It's can say that as well, I have no idea on what to do .. .. eh..... kind of hard to tell about his mental health history :'3 Thing is, he hasnt had anyy mental illness in the past....  it couldve been,, soemthing liek.... just curiousity, and getting sick and all that... with the whole woods and stuff ..........okay..... only mental illness i found out about is hes.... :3 autism ...... just like me....... sillyness illness @_@ 

(his brother told me btw)

... It was stevens birthday a few days ago... i can say, i could make him a cake, a small little cake but then again i dont think hes too fond of that idea from what i can think of ;^^

hmm. MAYBE just maybe ill ask HIM (steven) for advice or ares, theyre like smart >:3c !! maybe just maybe ill ask one of them !!! 

MAPLE-TAN IS SIGNING OFF !!!!! MEOW !!!!!!!!!!! 

good night